Faith Talk Fridays 

September 28, 2018

Jealousy, Envy and Negative Comparison: Devotional and Reflection

Jealousy, envy, and negative comparison are traps that distract you from the work God wants to do in your life. Struggles, I myself have had to conquer many times. I had to reflect on why I’d even do this and look at what God has to say. Ultimately it’s God who gets us through these struggles. I only created this devotional and reflection as a tool to help you push past jealousy, envy or negative comparison you may be facing. Remember you’re not alone in feeling this way. It’s possible to get over it. You don’t have to stay stuck in this unhealthy cycle. Grab a pen and journal so you can follow along in steps provided below.

I want to start out by sharing Proverbs 14:30, “A peaceful heart leads to a healthy body; jealousy is like cancer to the bones.”

I remember coming across that verse when I was at really low point. I realized how true it was because my heart literally felt sick month after month. I thought, what’s wrong with me? Why can’t I shake this off? I wanted a peaceful heart and healthy body, but jealousy, envy and negative comparison were major things dragging me down.  

Maybe you wish you had something about her physical look. Maybe you envy her lifestyle. Maybe you’re jealous of her talents. Maybe she has the guy. There could be so many more maybes here that make you feel like you can’t measure up.

Follow these steps :

Step 1: Admit who you are jealous, envying or negatively comparing yourself to out loud to God. I know it may feel a little awkward. They do say the first step to overcoming a problem is admitting it.

Step 2:  Reflect on why you’re jealous, envying or negatively comparing yourself to this person.

Okay, got it!?

I have some news. Jealousy, envy, and negative comparison will always be a lose-lose situation for you no matter what. God has a call on her life that nobody can do anything about except for her; if she chooses to follow it. If she chooses to go after the call God has on her life wouldn’t you want your sister in Christ to succeed? And if she chooses not to go after that call wouldn’t you still want her to end up going down the right path to succeed?

 If we are to be cheering other women on, building them up and hope they live a victories life in Christ Jesus then shouldn’t we start clapping for them rather than rolling our eyes? Whether or not she succeeds, it’s a lose-lose situation for you because her success doesn’t define you. God defines you and has a separate plan for your life.

 In Jeremiah 29:11 God is speaking to the people he sent to Babylon. He shares a message of hope that people throughout time can grasp onto. It says. “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”

That goes for you and her. But totally separate plans. You need to separate yourself from her in your mind, realizing you both have your own destinies.

“Pay careful attentions to your own work, for then you will get the satisfaction of a job well done, and you won’t need to compare yourself to anyone else. For we are each responsible for our own conduct.” –Galatians 6:4-5

Next steps:

Step 3: Now I want you to take some time to write down 5 good things about her.

Step 4: Pray for her like you’d want to be prayed for.  

Okay, so why did I have you do that?

Matthew 5:44 says, “But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you!” Now you might be thinking she’s not your enemy and that she doesn’t persecute you. You’ve just had ill feelings towards what she has going on. If that’s you, know I share this because jealousy, envy and negative comparison can lead to someone becoming an enemy in your mind really quickly. When you love and pray for that person, you’re overcoming evil with good. You’re fixing your eyes on hoping for goodness and blessings to rain in their life. It keeps you from thinking selfishly.  

Challenge: I challenge you to start praying for her when jealousy, envy or negative comparison sneaks up on you. There is power in praying over her. It helps change your perspective! Maybe even get to know her better. Chances are she faces her own struggles and she’s also pretty cool! I want you to have a peaceful heart and healthy body. Most importantly, put Jesus before yourself. When putting Jesus first, our perspective changes. We don’t see others as threats. We do what He calls us to do because we see there is a bigger picture. Jealousy, envy and negative comparison is proof that we are actually making life more about us and not so much Him. We are to be building up His kingdom, not our own kingdom or worrying about what someone else life looks like.

Takeaway:

  • Her destiny is her destiny and your destiny is your destiny. What she does and who she is doesn’t define you. You’re lives have separate stories and nobody can come between the plan God has for her and the plan God has for you. We are responsible our own walks.
  • Remember, it’s about Jesus. We should hope she goes after the calling he has on her life to be a part of building HIS kingdom.
  • Pray for her if those negative feelings arise. You’ll be surprised how much prayer can turn your heart around.
  • Most important: Cling to what God’s word says and never stop asking him for help.

August 24, 2018

Proverbs 3 Devotional

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By:Chelsea Bender

A while back I created a devotional and reflection study to do with my husband all on Proverbs 3. While cleaning out my office I found it and thought why not share it here?! What I love about Proverbs 3 is that it focuses a lot on trusting in the Lord.

Follow along by grabbing a pen, paper and your bible. I’ve also attached a free printable of this study with writing space if you prefer to write on it.  Click Here for Proverbs 3 Devotional Printable.

Proverbs 3: 1-2 “My child, never forget the things I have taught you. Store my command in your heart. If you do this, you will live many years, and your life will be satisfying.”

  • When we store God’s commands in our hearts, how do we go about our days differently than if we did not store his commands in our heart?

Proverbs3: 3-4 “Never let loyalty and kindness leave you. Tie them around your neck as a reminder. Write them deep within your heart. Then you will find favor with God and people, and you will win a good reputation.”

I think God tells us to tie these character traits around our neck as a reminder and to write them deep within our heart because he knows how challenging it can be. In the Life Application Study Bible it says, “A loyal person acts responsibly. A kind person works for the justice for others. Thoughts and words are not enough – our life reveals whether we are truly loyal and kind. Do your actions measure up to your attitude?”

  • When can loyalty and showing kindness be challenging in your own life?
  • If you were to not be loyal and be unkind how do you think that would affect your reputation?


Proverbs 3: 5-6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.”

This one is my all-time favorite verse because we can look to it in different seasons of our lives. It reminds us that even when things around us seem like they aren’t making sense, we can always trust that God is taking care of our life in the midst of it all.

  • Is there something you are struggling to trust God with? Why?
  • Has there ever been a time you were not trusting God but then you realized there was nothing to worry about the whole time

Sometimes we have to take a moment to look back on the promises God has fulfilled and the blessings surrounding us today. In our waiting there is always something to be grateful for.

  • List 5 things you’re grateful for today:

Read Proverbs 3: 7-26

  • God says we will have healing for our bodies and strength for our bones when we do what?
  • What should you honor the Lord with and why is it important?
  • What should you not reject from the Lord?
  • From these verses what have you learned about wisdom?
  • What have you learned about not losing sight of common sense and discernment?

These verses speak to us on seeking God’s will and not our own. We need to seek wisdom, not lose sight of discernment or common sense, and listen to correction from the Lord so we don’t fall into the traps and temptations. To fear the Lord is to show him respect and reverence. It’s allowing the one who loves us deeper than anyone else to go before us.

Proverbs 3:27-28 “Do not withhold good from those who deserve it. When it’s in your power to help them. If you can help your neighbor now, don’t say, come back tomorrow, and then I’ll help you.”

When I read these verses the first thing that comes to mind is the saying, “treat others the way you would want to be treated.” Let’s not be inconsiderate or unfair. Stick to your word and reach out a helping hand. The Life Application Study Bible says, “Withholding destroys trust and creates a great inconvenience for the other person.”

Read Proverbs 3: 29-35

Lastly, be careful with what you focus on. Avoid drama of causing harm and plotting fights. Don’t get caught up in envying what others have or what they do. God sees the heart of all people.

He loves you. He sees you. He takes care of you. 


June 1, 2018

John the Baptist. Brave Enough to Speak the Truth.

There was something special about John the Baptist. He was on a mission to get the word out about Jesus, so that everyone may believe because of his testimony. John was not afraid to speak up to the crowds about Jesus. What I love is his great example of remaining humble through it. He was not focused on his status even though he was well known. God had to make John known to make Jesus known. He picked a man who…. continue reading


January 12, 2018

Paul Was Not A Quitter

In Acts 17 Paul demonstrates not being a quitter even when others where against him. He went wherever God called him to go. I think he displays a great example to keep moving forward in our walk with God even when getting mocked, questioned and laughed at…..continue reading

 October 13, 2017  

Government and Authority


September 29, 2017

What Matters

There are lists of things that matter to us in this life, such as; our jobs, family, friends, getting bills paid or even catching up with our favorite TV show. The list could go on. I’ve been asking myself the question, what matters most to…… continue reading


August 25, 2017

Making Peace With Others


August 18, 2017

Complaining in the wilderness

Have you ever been in a season that you didn’t expect to be in so long? It felt like you were going around the same mountain over and over again. When we end up in a place that seems like it’s taking forever to get out of it can be easy to complain and question God. I’ve been there and done that many times. In fact it wasn’t long ago a friend warned me about the effects of being a complainer. The truth is……continue reading


August 4, 2017

Don’t Let Stuff Own You 

I planned on digging deep into a different message today but my mind couldn’t get off of this one. I recently heard the words “Don’t let stuff own you.” When you hear that it could mean something different to other people…….continue reading

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